I had to take a looooooong train ride the other day. I’ll admit to you all that while I’m super grateful that I don’t have to drive downtown, look or and pay for (expensive) parking I do wish that I didn’t have to be crammed into a metal tube with approximately a billion other people. (hey! I said approximately!)
I am acutely aware that I have a large personal space; what can I say? Still, the train does provide some interesting things to observe and talk about.
One thing I wanted to talk to you about today (and get your thoughts on) was the concept of being religious and/or spiritual.
Yessir! We are going deep today. In fact, I kept hesitating around writing this. Not only is this post rather personal but I know it will inflame someone and being me I don’t like to upset people but I think the world is changing and raising its awareness. This is a conversation worth having.
Let me back up a bit for you so that you can understand why this peaks my interest. While some might say the two words really are the same thing I have to politely disagree. Perhaps it is just my way of making sense of my world to take apart words like this but as you know all know…words have power.
Okay. So I grew up and went to Sunday School and then Church and I’ve actually read the Bible. I can admit, I was younger and really skimmed some parts – especially all the ‘who beget who’ stuff. I’m sure it’s important, but at 14 years old, it was not an attention holder.
As I grew older, I struggled with some concepts. I loved the services, the rituals and the overall message, but many things confused me. Let me tell you, as a child it’s hard to understand exactly why adults get so upset when you ask the tough questions. The Church I went to had wonderful people dedicated to helping others, who had strong faith and who were generally good people and I learned a lot from them.
However, one of the things I learned is religion is a touchy subject for many. Since I was a young child I have asked questions that have upset people and I never could understand why. It seemed to me that not knowing wasn’t the problem nor was it why people were upset. I felt that refusing to look at your own beliefs is not faith..it’s blind.
So why did I drift away from my religion and the Church? It didn’t all fit for me. So, I started to learn about other religions. I found that most weren’t really all that different. Oh sure, on the surface they were but at the roots almost every base of every thing is love. The love of the Creator – no matter what his/her name – and all living things was the basis for all I could see; but not how many actually lived.
I found my connection to a higher power outside of buildings, but was told that didn’t work, I needed to go to Church. This is where I struggled.
I was blessed as an adult to finally find a Priest who was open to talking about all these questions – and admitting that he didn’t have all the answers. Ironically, he was found in a Church that wasn’t my own. Someone close to me had decided to rededicate themselves which was a beautiful thing.
This man, he was called Father John, was very matter of fact. He told me that he was not religious at all til his 30’s when he was called to the Church. I was taken aback by that. I mean, how do you reconcile not believing at all to ministering in a Church? His story opened my eyes to many things.
Father John listened and more than that he understood. He released my need to have to call myself by any particular name or religious affiliation if it didn’t feel right to do so. I will forever be grateful to this man for being honest and transparent and allowing me to share my soul with him without judgement. It was this minister that opened my eyes to how everything is so interconnected – even religions. It was this man of the church who told me that a church is simply a building dedicated to God – but still just a building. The Creator is found everywhere at anytime he said. Finally, someone who understood and could help me understand.
It was around this time that I found The Dalai Lama’s quote “My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.” that something clicked for me. It was then I started looking at what it means to be spiritual and religious. We can look at the definition of the words to see there is a difference.
*I borrowed these definitions from www.Dictionary.com if you want to read more of the information there.
re·li·gious
1.of, pertaining to, or concerned with religion: a religious holiday.
spir·it·u·al
1.of, pertaining to, or consisting of spirit; incorporeal.
Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an extremely long comment but after I clicked
submit my comment didn’t show up. Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again.
Regardless, just wanted to say superb blog!
Hi Bonnie,
I can tell you put your heart and soul into this post and I love it! I grew up with a very religious father and a not so religious mother. The two of them shared separate views but decided to raise us as Catholics. Like you, when I was young, this was the way to go My sons were also raised Catholic. But as I grew into my own world and thoughts, I became less interested in attending the church but I do feel that I am very spiritual.
There is a difference in my mind but religion is a very private matter for many and comes with many opinions and views.
Cindy Portz Murphy (posted by me per email request as she had trouble getting her comment to work)
http://getitdonemarketingsolutions.com
Truthfully, I shy away from this topic, but I definitely vibe more with spirituality rather than religion precisely because of your distinction — connection with a religious order = religion. My favorite line in this post is “I just know that we need to be aware that not everyone will connect the same way and that is okay.” You are so lucky to have had someone be open to your curiosity and for that person to be so open. I think that’s rare because most religious people I’ve met are “blind” evangelists. Personally, I love the idea of learning more and more about different religions and finding similarities in them all, the pieces of glue that bind humanity.
I think many shy away from this topic Samantha. Why do you?
You wrote this post straight from your heart and I can tell that you have found peace in your spiritual journey.
Ido think there is a difference between practicing religious rituals and having a spiritual relationship with your Creator that changes your life. I also think it is very possible to be religious and spiritual.
Your actions show what you really believe….actions speak louder than words.
I have found some peace Janette and I am so grateful that you noticed and mentioned that. It’s been a long time coming, but I’m still evolving, still learning and opening up new layers of awareness. I have gotten to a point however where I am excited about the journey instead of resisting it.
It was through belonging to a religious organization that I learned that spiritual means to have the Lord’s spirit with me. I struggle with words and concepts because sometimes I do not understand things. Right now I am struggling with the words dealing with glory, glorify, God’s glory, giving glory to God. I can sit and meditate on some set of words like that, reading different scriptural references and allow myself to be confused. In so doing I am learning from the Lord’s spirit direct to my spirit–hence the answer will be a spiritual one. Going to church sometimes helps me understand. Some times the answer comes from a seemingly non-religious, non-spiritual source, but it is the Lord’s spirit that sends the answer to me.
Thanks for writing about this. You have added to my understanding of many things.
Hi Ann
I think it’s important to realize that many words have different meanings as well as different levels of meaning. A really simply example of this is weather. For some 70 degrees might be super hot and they will think it’s summer. Scroll on over to another area in the South and they might think 70 is downright chilly. Same weather – different take on it because of what it means to YOUR life.
If you feel that spirituality means the Lord is with you that is wonderful. For me it means I am connecting my spirit with the Source. Ultimately, any connection with a higher power will be personal and our ‘take’ on it will come from personal understanding and experience.
Just know that it’s okay to feel differently than someone else…even a Minister.
Yes Bonnie there is a difference. Religion is about ritual and some people seem to follow that religiously (pun intended). Spirituality is about choice and is personal and private. I believe in a Supreme Being and I talk with him/her constantly. And life is because there is a higher being.
I think for me Religion is about organizing everything and everyone to feel the same way and do the same things. What do you think about that?
I could have written this post as it’s nearly word for word how I feel. I was raised Catholic, raising my kids as such. My hubby is Lutheran. The basics of any religion should be love, compassion, kindness, and forgiveness… and probably one or two more thrown into the mix. Good thoughts, Bonnie.
Thanks for your thoughts Peggy Lee. 🙂 A visit from you always brightens my day.
Religious to us (my family) means the practices employed We go to work religiously. We practice our faith religiously. (That is NOT an oxymoron- some folks practice their faith once or twice a year, we follow daily practices- one day we may even get it perfect). We listen to NPR religiously.
Spiritual to us (again, my family) means how we feel connect to the Supreme Being. It is a feeling we get when we see a new child being born, or when a rainbow is appearing….
Oh, and those begats… they actually do mean something- but it was lost in translation 🙂
It’s true..some people are religious on Sunday mornings. I highly respect you Roy because you walk your talk and live your faith.
I do think there is a difference between the two, and used rightly they can be partners. Unfortunately, religion has historically been so misused to control and manipulate people that the word itself has come to mean the misuse of it. In that sense, religion becomes the exact opposite of spirituality, seeking to separate us from our spirits so our minds can be controlled. But I think it’s unfair to characterize all religion in that way.
Rightly used, a religion is a context in which we can interpret our spiritual experience. The brain needs sensory input for understanding, and a religion provides it with physical representations of spiritual realities. I think that’s why much religious teaching is done in metaphor and simile.
Like you, I grew up in church. For years I believed my religion was the only “right” one. I’ve mellowed a bit in my middle-age, and I’m now more interested in how the various religions agree than in where they disagree. Far from “leading me astray”, learning about other faiths has increased my understanding of my own. Because in the end, all of them are merely representations of truths far greater than any of them.
And where they agree, well – I figure they’re all on to something, right? 🙂
First..thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this subject.
Then:
Oh wow…I just LOVE what you said there “And where they agree, well – I figure they’re all on to something, right?” Holy Cow that really nailed it for me!
This was truly beautiful, Bonnie. It’s in totally alignment with where “The Release” has taken me on this journey as well. I too, grew up in church, in one of the strictest faiths I’ve ever come across. Much like you, there were many inconsistency that I began noticing, and I had many questions and no one who couldn’t put down their “cross” long enough to answer them. After my mother passed away back in 2010, I admittedly lost my faith in God. But, what I came to understand in being honest with myself is that my faith in God had not shaken at all; but rather my faith in the people who attach themselves to God’s name. That revelation liberated me and set me out on a different path of spirituality. I’ve begun to open myself up to what the Source has been directing me, and it continues to open my understanding to so many fascinating truths. I recently was given a book called “A Course in Miracles,” and also recently read Micheal A. Singer’s “The Untethered Soul.” Both have been keys I attribute to my spiritual awakening. In the coming weeks, I will be taking RMT in a different direction, one that’s even more in alignment with my purpose. I cannot thank you enough for shedding such a brilliant light on this enlightening and ongoing evolving topic of discussion. I foresee a post being linked back to this in the very near future. Thank you again, my dear. Love this post and love you. 😉
Ah Deone..it always breaks my heart to hear you talk about what dark places you had to visit after your mother passed but I am so grateful that you moved through it and started shining your light. I cannot wait to see what new and amazing things you are about to accomplish with RMT! For those of you who havent visited go now! http://www.ReleasingMeToday.com