Last week I talked about a little experiment that I was about to embark on. In fact I challenged you to join me. Some of you wrote here or on my facebook page that you would and that made me very, VERY happy.
In case you missed it, (click here for the full story) I decided to go without complaints and only talk to others about all the good..no strike that…fabulous things that were happening in and around my life.
I figured I’d annoy some people, surprise a few and at the same time keep myself in a positive place. It turns out my expectations were wrong. I don’t usually enjoy admitting I’m wrong but this time I’m loving it.
My favourite example is one I shared on facebook.
Here’s what I wrote
“Okay day 2 of my experiment was fun. I was in a number of offices and when asked “How are you?” I decided to reply either ‘super-fabulous” or “I’m amazing”. Yes, I got some strange looks but every single look was followed by a smile and something along the lines of ‘good for you’. There was definite surprise though..of the good sort.
When I replied in kind and asked How they were the responses were far more positive and heartfelt. Not the usual ‘fine’ either. I got whole and interesting replies. There may be more to this than I originally thought.”
In fact, there was far more than what I thought to this whole venture.
Some things I learned about life from this.
- misery loves company, but so does happiness!
- it’s sad that people are entertained by someone simply being happy and enjoying what is in their life.
- it is wonderful that my outlook can change their outlook at the same time
- I got much better service from everyone when I was excited about life
- although a few times I had to really work at it, the fake it til you make it plan does work.
- Responding that I was ‘super-fabulous” elicited smiles every single time
- When you offer up the courage to share your happiness, others are more willing to do the same
- Happiness is a freakin choice! No Fooling!
Not to say it was all a bed of roses and rainbows. I did have one person who shall remain nameless (but you know who you are) try to dampen my happy parade with a few comments like “what are you on?” Because clearly no one can be happy unless it’s chemically induced, right?
But the worst comment was “gah, you’re so annoying being all like this-what’s your problem?” That comment did kind of set me back a little. Ouch. It kind of stung to hear that. I really was deflated for a moment. However, I quickly realized that this was not my stuff. It was a sign of this person’s own discomfort with feeling blessed, grateful and happy.
Still, this was a BIG lesson for me. I was initially hurt and deflated, but then i rebounded. I however, was acutely aware of what was going on because of this little experiment. I wonder though – how often do we do this to each other? Is this one of the reasons we are so afraid to just be happy and show it?
I find it so very strange to think that we need to develop a thick skin in order to allow ourselves to embrace the joys if this life.
Please folks. Even if you are in the depths of despair and miserable; if you see someone who is celebrating life don’t destroy it for them.
Instead, embrace what it means – that you too can find joy again. Embrace and love them for bringing that spark into the world and nurturing it.
The emotion of joy is a wonderful thing. Like love, it is incredible in its ability to be shared and grow instead of being diminished. Take some of their joy and stretch it; wrap it around your misery and know that things do get better, there is joy in the world and you can feel it.
This is the meaning of the saying “If you want to be happy, Be“.