Purpose, Passion or Pass?

Perhaps I am lucky that I have experienced both real passion and real focused purpose.   It’s only been in the last few years that I’ve been able to really understand that some people never get to feel either.

That makes me so sad – and I really want to DO something about it.  The problem is of course I know that everyone has the opportunity at some point.  Some people just choose to pass on it.

I’ve also realized you can’t MAKE someone dig deep unless they are ready and willing.  I’ve tried in the past.  I’ve even thought I succeeded but then nope..not so much.

All I can do is live my life in a purposefully and passionate way and hope that inspires.  I figure if I can move someone to start on their own life journey awake instead of sleepwalkng through it then that would be more than enough. 

I can also offer up some of my own experiences which is what I often do with these blog posts.  Digging is hard work, even when it’s mental and not physical.  BUT I do know that both types of digging is easier if someone lends you a hand – or a shovel.

I knew for most of high school that I was going to be a teacher.  I just knew.  It bubbled up from my heart of hearts and drove me to do what I had to do.  My passion drove my purpose which gave me my continued motivation.  

So what happens when you get to a point where you feel like you’ve achieved what you needed to? 

You have a choice even then.  Find your passion, dig up your new purpose or pass and stay right where you are.

This is what was happening to me a few years back.  I felt like I had reached a leveling off in my growth and the craving for something MORE started. 

It was this craving I think that may have been starting even when I moved across the country alone to live on the west coast.  I don’t think I recognized it yet but it may be that is when the seeds had been planted or struggling to break free of their shells.

Either way, I was looking for my own passion and purpose.  While I love teaching the kids and enjoy it still, I know I have grown and want to play a bigger game in my life.

Probably why I got certified as a Coach in the first place.  Stepping stones to where I was headed.

Lately I’ve been feeling like I need to be able to go even deeper.  With myself, my business and all of life.  I can see it, taste it even…but didn’t know quite how to get there.

I was a bit stuck.  Funny how stuck rhymes so nicely with YUCK isn’t it?

I started getting an idea but I was resisting opening up to it fully.  I’m not even sure why.  So much has changed the last few years that I think perhaps I just wanted to stay in some comfortable settings for a while but my restless heart would have none of that.

The signs started showing  up more and more often until one day I just took action.  A tiny small thing…reaching out to a friend for some information…that lead to a huge leap.

Suddenly, I’m headed back to school!  I’m upgrading my skills, opening doors and freaking out with happiness! 

I can’t quite see around the bend in the path yet but as soon as my feet hit this road I knew…just KNEW it was the right one.

I won’t kid you that my inner saboteur jumped right out and started yelling about ‘what if this’ and ‘what would happen’ sort of stuff.   I gotta say I almost smiled at that.  It means what I’m doing is just scary enough to bring about some serious leaps and bounds of growth.  I’m aiming so BIG!!

I answered that little voice with faith and then told her to shut up and sit down, cuz I’m doing it anyway.  Oh yes…I got this!

Open hearts find their passions – you already know what it is I promise you.  Fear and inner beliefs try to keep us from them.  Quite a dance really. 

I believe in me (and it’s taken a lot of work to be able to say that with real conviction!) but I also believe in YOU.  If you are having trouble finding your own purpose just look at what makes your heart sing.  

My heart sings when I help other women figure out what makes their hearts sing…pretty awesome huh?

How much attention have you been paying to growing your life?  Do you have Purpose, Passion or do you Pass?

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How do you stay motivated for the long haul?

I get a lot of interesting questions these days because in my monthly newsletter I have a section called “Ask the Coach”.  You can email me your questions and I’ll answer them in the newsletter. 

One question I get over and over again is about motivation and how to GET and KEEP it.

There is a simple formula I use to explain how internal motivation works and I’m about to share with you this juicy not-so-secret secret.

Motivation starts with breaking into some strong feelings.  Sometimes it’s fear; which oddly can be a pretty good motivator to get you moving.  The problem with fear is that is won’t KEEP you motivated. Plus it’s kind of stressful to live that way and we all know that stress will give you wrinkles!

So what keeps people going strong and doing what it takes day after day; even when it’s really hard?

First, they are clear on what they want.

They tend to work not from the motivator fear, but from a deeper well.  One filled by passionate purpose.

But more – oh so much more – importantly…they know the why behind it.

People who are passionate with a purpose can move mountains and touch the stars. They are connected so deeply in their souls to their purpose that it becomes part of the truth of their lives.

How can that not wake you up in the morning ready to go out and do whatever it takes?

Hey, we all get pumped up and excited by things in the moment.  Marketers depend on that~ (hello time-share seminars? ) In order to keep that kind of pumped up, loving my life; seeing the endless possibilities sort of attitude, you NEED to ask your self why you want it.  Why, why WHY??  And then dig a little deeper into your soul to make sure you are being painfully honest about it.

THAT is where you find out your purpose and where you get your motivation.

But it ain’t easy, it takes real courage and perseverance to dig that deep and drag that purpose out into the light.

Are you ready to look deeper?

 

 

 

PS. You can grab access to my free monthly newsletter on the sidebar…with a bonus or simply click this link!

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What were you doing at this age?

It’s been a long week this week.  You know the kind.  Nothing horrible has happened – in fact it’s been good – just LONG.

I added a big (like the whole day from Monday to Friday) project to my roster.  I’m working with some fantastic kids who are visiting from Korea to see what schools here are like.

My job is to work on their English and help them adjust to culture shock.  If you’ve been around for a while reading my blog you know I’ve done this before. 

It’s pretty awesome when you take step back and look at it.

These kids are mostly 11-13 years old.  They’ve not only studied hard and learned another language but won a contest to come here in this program.  Add to that they are staying with host families because their parents did not come with them.  When they left…they were leaving behind everyone they know.

Now the children have made friends, many have begun to enjoy their host families and are learning tons.  Many of them have big dreams too.  Lots of them want to be diplomats or scientists and the like.  This experience will help them do that.

What were YOU doing at 11-13 years old? 

Seriously…are you even chasing your dreams this hard now?

I really enjoy being with these kids.  My voice usually starts to wobble (it is a LOT of talking over and over) and it’s really quite draining, but still.  You can’t ask for more inspiriation to light a fire under your butt to do something today to make your own dreams come true.

Ask yourself what you keep saying you want to do ‘someday’.  Where does your mind go when you have time to just think about nothing?  Someday can be today…it should be today. 

And please don’t tell me it’s too late, you’re too busy or too old or any other crap that you and I both know is just excuses because you’re feeling a bit like a big ol chicken.  Ya, I said it. I know because I feel that way too sometimes and it’s okay. Just don’t let your old emotional habits rule your life.  Make another choice to do it anyway.  Fear won’t and can’t hurt you. It’s just a feeling.

So, I challenge you to make one step towards your dreams.  Make that phone call, write an outline for your book, look up information…whatever it is just go get started.  Watch fear slink away.

Life is too short to waste sitting around waiting for someday.   Screw someday…let’s go make it happen TODAY.

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On My Bucket List

Do you have one of those bucket lists?  You know..the wish list, the life list…whatever you want to call it.

I do.  Only I don’t pay it all that much mind from day-to-day.  I have big goals and things I’m working on and seem to get distracted by those dreams.

Still every time I notice my bucket list I get very emotional. These are real to me.  Pinterest has made it loads of fun to create this list. I love visuals!

I started thinking about why I have this list if I don’t pay enough attention to it.  What’s going on there? 

Interestingly enough, I came up with a lot of excuses…or reasons? Nah..they were excuses.

Let’s see.  A couple of favorites that came to play?

• there is only so much time in a day
• and just who is going to pay for all this?
• can’t just leave everything and go off like a nutter (yes you can, I’ve done it before! lol)
• what to do first?

I kept picking at this one and realized that while many things might take some planning and maybe won’t happen today; they also won’t happen ever if I don’t mind them and start making some steps towards them!

Okay, while it’s true I can’t do everything in one day I can certainly prioritize and start the process of getting things underway. 

So what’s the problem?  Well first of all I needed to work though these questions I think.  Then it hit me…shoot.  So much of this was fear talking one more time.  Once I opened that door, I could hear so much more of what my heart and soul were really saying.  I heard things like “what if I never make it and all that planning and work amount to nothing?  I think we know the answer to that…’so what?’  Some of it was just simply fear of moving forward to the unknown.

One of the biggest things I have on my list is travel, travel and more travel.  I struggle with travelling alone since my car accident.  I suppose that makes sense BUT it won’t get me to those experiences.  Time to figure out some things around that!  I don’t want my list to be just wishes in the wind.

So, how often do you plan for things on your bucket list?  How or what do you do to make the dreams come down to reality?  I’d love to know how you handle this!

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Determined to Persist

Benjamin Franklin once said that “energy and persistence conquer all things.”

That guy knew a very big secret to success and to happiness. It isn’t just about talent or skill set.  It more often is about persistence.

This is true in every aspect of life.  Ever heard the saying that overnight success takes 10 years?  It’s really bang on. We can learn the skills needed if we continue putting the energy into it. There are so many examples of people who are successful who were not especially talented, educated or extra smart.  They found success through persistence and dogged determination.

I know this is going to hurt some people’s sensitivities but sometimes it needs to be said.  This is so often the point where I see people struggling when they come to me and say that they can’t figure out why success eludes them. 

What do I hear? Things like…

• it’s really hard
• I slipped off the wagon so now it’s over
• I don’t know how
• no one told me
• I made a plan and it didn’t work
• this wasn’t how it was supposed to be

It’s really hard to watch the disappointment and frustration on people’s faces when I feel the need to bluntly explain some life lessons.  Please take what I’m about to say with the love and care that is intended.  

Lesson:  Success rarely hits you on your first foray out.  You are foolish to think you can do everything in one shot simply because you made a plan.

Okay but here’s the good news.  You did find success…just perhaps not the one you were looking for.   Just because you planned for huge success in one area doesn’t mean it will work out.  Still, you gained valuable insights, skills and learned more of that which you needed to know.

This is where persistence comes into play.  You’ve got to keep going, adjusting the plan and perhaps even the goals. 

 This is true all over the place.  It’s true for business, career, relationships, healthy living, wellness…heck learning to ride a bike!  You name it, if you give up because the first try didn’t work you’d still be stuck crawling around on all fours. 

Nothing is as powerful as persistence.  If you have passion for something you will be determined to persist. 

One of my favorite metaphors for persistence comes from the story of how a small stream can, over time wear away solid stone.  Water would not seem at first to be able to change the way that the hard stone looks but through time, persistence and movement it most certainly can.  In fact the water’s movement shapes entire landscapes…all through persistence.

Have you ever noticed a flower or bit of grass growing in a strange place?  How about through rock?  How do you suppose a fragile flower manages to fragment rock? You know…persistance. 

Keep this in mind next time you are feeling frustrated that success did not show up for this round of effort. 

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock,the stream always wins – not through strength, but through persistence.”
~Buddha~

And may you find the pleasure that comes from the lessons learned by simply pushing forth and staying determined.  Every flower, every person will bloom when they are ready, but not before they do the work to find a way to feel the warmth of the sun.

 

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